'This service may be the perfect blend of health care and pleasure. This service leaves you soothed and with skin as soft as a baby. Exotic plants and essential oils massage you from head to toe.'
Now.....what it actually said was
'Performed in a special 'Wet Room' where water can flow over you and onto the table, this service leaves you soothed and with skin as soft as a baby.'
Why had I not noticed the beginning of that sentence?
Well, when the masseuse got to my buttocks I got the giggles and once I got the giggles I couldn't stop!! Honestly, it was fine - a bit embarrassing but fine, till she got to my buttocks!! Have you seen the movie Karate Kid? There is a bit in it where the karate mentor, Mr Miyagi, is teaching his apprentice karate moves by getting him to wash his car (Can you guess where I am going with this yet??) - so both hands start in one place then one goes in a circle to the left whilst the other goes in a circle to the right and he says 'Wax on.....Wax off' she was doing that..... to my buttocks!!! She then stopped, obviously waiting for some kind of explanation but she didn't speak any English - the only thing I could think of, and that I could say in Thai, was that my bottom was not beautiful!! She then started laughing (hmm I wonder why!!) I'd only just recovered when she turned the water on which felt quite nice till she pulled my feet - I nearly went shooting off the end of the table it was so slippery!! So as you have probably guessed that was me giggling away again!!! I am just not mature enough to have a body scrub!!
Was I soothed......I don't think so!! (Well, at least not from the massage - the champagne we all had after the massage definately helped!!)
In saying that.....I am going back tomorrow to have a facial (Chris is treating me as part of my birthday present) and I have read through what it actually involves very carefully.......there is no mention anywhere about a wet room so I reckon I'll be safe!!
If you are curious - I'm going to try the Baan Dalah 7-Step Spa Facial with Light Therapy (Facial Cleansing Oil, Awakening Reviver Scrub, Herbal Alcohol-free Toner, Facial Massage Cream, Awakening Detox Mask, Moisturizing Cream then the Light Therapy). I'll let you know how I get on!!